I"m allergic to my dog

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I am allergic to life.

This is because I am allergic to peanuts, almonds, cashews, walnuts, shellfish, dust, pollen, grass, dogs, cats, horses, mold and dust mites.

I am also wheat and gluten intolerant.

I was allergic to milk (chocolates and ice-cream included). 

It’s surprising that I can function. 

People think that this would make my life extremely difficult.

(Plus I live in Korea so I can’t read the ingredients on most food that I buy)

But really, I am so used to living with hoards of allergies, I don’t think it’s all that hard.

You can’t miss something you’ve never had right? 

I don’t feel bad that I can’t eat Ferraro Roche, peanut butter or almond covered chocolate cake.

Actually, until a few years ago – I thought all nuts were salty (like chips).

I was all like, why would you want to put chips on cake and in chocolate? weird.

I’m used to my allergies and random outbreaks…

They make life interesting ^^

Living every day and eating something new is like jumping out of a plane in some ways.
Maybe not a big plane. Maybe not a plane.
Let’s go with jumping into a pool and not knowing how deep it is. Much better metaphor.
The point is I never know what’s going to happen.

I’ve learnt to live with most of these allergies pretty well I think… Except one.

I’m allergic to most animals with hair. 

This is the one allergy I’d like to change though~

Because I have a dog.

I love my dog. His name is Dippy and he’s pretty awesome.

I am highly allergic to him. 

But it’s OK because I love him and we have to make sacrifices for love.

Dippy is one strange dog. 

He runs into the furniture. But he’s not blind (we checked).

He loves to lick things. Everything. It’s weird and gross.

Dippy thinks he’s a big, scary dog. He most definitely is not.
Imagine a miniature dachshund … Now imagine a really fat one.
He is basically a fat sausage.
A fat scared sausage.

He likes food. A LOT. Dippy has a weight problem. But don’t tell him.

We tried to put him on a diet.

…

He chose the weakest link (my mom) and would nibble her toes every time he was hungry.
She would get extremely freaked out by the incessant nibbles and secretly sneak him food.
So… effectively, my dog trained my mom when to feed him.

He has his own favourite couch… It is where he takes naps. 

If you raise your voice, Dippy does this weird sad eye thing and starts to walk backwards slowly.
It is really cute and very awkward because he has short stubby legs.

Dippy is scared of water.

He also is scared of vacuum cleaners, the washing machine,
my dad when he wears a beanie, black bins (only the black ones), falling leaves, wind and hair dryers.

Dippy is awesome.

I miss this crazy dog quite a lot. Except the weird licking. That I’m OK without.